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Richelle is one of my dearest friends. We have a very intimate relationship -- we know each other well including each others' fears. As someone who has been a sex educator and is sex positive, Richelle is someone I've wanted to include in Sexplanations videos for a long time. She could address just about every topic. When I thought about the dream episode with her though it was the two of us talking about our vulnerabilities -- where we get scared of ourselves, others, and those connections, sexually.
This episode is a pretty raw back and forth of my fears and Richelle's fears -- our false evidence appearing real. Some of what we say isn't articulate or perfectly sex positive. Instead of being afraid that you're going to judge us harshly for this, I'm going to trust that you know we're doing the best we can and as human beings we make mistakes. We're trying to love ourselves and that is a learning process.
Thank you for being supportive of this channel and sex education at large. One of my greatest sexual fears is that people aren't receiving the knowledge and care they need to make healthy decisions. I'm so proud of the Sexplanations' audience for your part in increases access to sexual health information for others and for investing in yourselves. Stay curious.
Here's a detailed list of the fears we brought up:
Fears about me
Fears about others
Fears about relationship
Fear I’m not good enough
sexually
Fear of my performance
Fear others won’t perform well
Fear others aren’t good enough
Fear others won’t hear me
understand me
Fear others don’t know their own needs
Fear others can’t communicate their needs
Fear of what other people think about my body
Fear of being being abnormal
Fear of being wrong
Fear of gravity
Age
Squishing
Smashing
Birth control harming partners
Fear of being slow to figure out my identity
Fear of not knowing body
Fear of not knowing how to communicate
Fear of no getting my needs met
Fear of not having courage
Fear of doing something a new partner doesn’t like
Fear of not being able to impress someone
sexually
Fear sexualities don’t match up like I expect
Fear of disappointment from unmet expectations
Fear of others’ disappointment in me
Fear of saying something someone doesn’t like
Fear that what I thought works, doesn’t always
Fear of stronger emotions than others
Fear of imbalance
Fear of an unequal power balance
Fear of being too connected
Fear of not being connected enough
Fear of enjoying sex more than others
Fear of not enjoying sex as much as others
Fear of abandonment
Fear of not being enough
Fear of dissatisfaction
Fear of being talked about
Fear sex with Dr. Doe isn’t good
Fear of brand damage
Fear of dishonesty
Fear of sexually transmitted infections
Fear of being manipulated
Fear of addiction or habituation
Fear of clit lock
Fear of limiting myself
Fear of not being okay without...
Fear of accepting bad things for good sex
Fear of accepting bad sex for good things
Dr. Doe's contact info:
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